In The Midst Of Chaos: An MC Romance Read online

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  I prided myself in being honest and keeping it straight, and the truth was I loved these boys but not in the same way.

  “We all got to pull our weight around here, and Finley hasn’t done shit,” Nash spat before he walked out of the room.

  My blood boiled.

  Hasn’t done shit? How the hell was I supposed to do anything when I was kicked out? He knew damn well but wanted to act like he was a victim.

  “Everyone clear out,” Axton shouted at us.

  Duncan got up, and it made me realize just how much time had passed. He was no longer lanky, but looked taller than his brothers, but that was because he was thinner. Huxley started to pull me out of the room, and I was grateful when Axton spoke.

  “Except for Finley.”

  Waving Huxley goodbye, I took a seat across from Axton and hoped he would let me leave. It’d worked once before; I hoped it worked again.

  “Did you clear your head while you were away?”

  “I did.”

  He interrupted me before I could say more.

  “Good, because Nash is right. You can’t go anywhere.”

  “So, you drag me back when it’s convenient for you?” I questioned. Axton gave me a cold look.

  “Finley, you’re the one that left.”

  Yeah, and he knew what had happened that night, and he didn’t care. He never once checked up on me.

  “Please, I’m almost done with school,” I begged.

  My uncle gave me a sad smile.

  “We are at war, Finley, and I don’t want you to be the next casualty.”

  Chapter Two

  My room was exactly how I had left it: the same gray walls with black-and-white portraits from the Hollywood glamour era. I walked up to my dresser and ran my finger over the countertop, and it was spotless; no dust had settled.

  They were prepared for my arrival.

  The feeling made my stomach dip in excitement and nerves. It was probably Huxley awaiting my return. To unite the Crulls and the Primroses was the dream. Two houses becoming one.

  My once best friend, now my fiancé.

  I had hoped that with my aunt’s death, all wedding talk would be pushed back.

  War: a state of armed conflict.

  There were many words in the English language that carried a burden when spoken with conviction, and war was one of them. It’s not like I was surprised. I grew up knowing that there would come a day conflict would land at our doorstep. It was the way of my world.

  Now that I was in my old room and my body was coming down from the adrenaline high, I felt a little shook. My aunt was dead, we were at war, Hux still wanted to marry me, and no one said otherwise. Oh, and my heart and pussy still throbbed when I saw Nash.

  Sighing, I sat on the edge of the bed. Eleanor was dead, and although it upset me, and I had cried when I first found out, it was just a matter of time until one of us got taken out. To be honest, I always thought about our deaths: Axton for being at the head, Nash because he was fearless, Huxley for wanting to be better than what we were brought into, and me for being the only Primrose left.

  Looking down at the bedsheets, I curled my lips in disgust and walked out of my room. As the princess of Crull manor, I had one of the towers. My windows overlooked the back of the estate and allowed me to see toward the forest and the lake.

  I tried to remember when was the last time I ate something, and when I couldn’t recall, I decided I should start off by getting some food.

  “Welcome home, Finnie,” I muttered to myself as I made my way to the kitchen.

  “Did you miss us that much, babe, that you have started talking to yourself?” Duncan’s smoky voice called out.

  Duncan was sitting on the ledge that showed the bottom half of the house. The plank was about five inches. He didn’t seem to care. His feet were hanging, and he was about to light a cigarette.

  “Oh, yes, Can-Can, I was going crazy delirious without you. What’s a girl to do?” My voice was low, à la Marilyn Monroe sounding like a bimbo.

  He smiled and jumped off, coming to me and hugging me. He wrapped me in his arms and lifted me in the air as he twirled me.

  His action had me stunned. And I wondered if any of them ever questioned my disappearance. What had happened that bloody night!

  Duncan had always been my favorite. Maybe because he was younger, or perhaps because I wasn’t set to marry him or wanted to fuck him.

  “Why are you nice to me?” The question slipped.

  Duncan’s eyebrows raised in confusion.

  “Why wouldn’t I be nice? I fucking missed you. Was I pissed you left without saying goodbye? Hell yeah, but then Mom said you’d be back, that sometimes a girl needs time away or something like that.”

  Huh? I shook my head. I would analyze everything later. As for now, I let myself get caught up in the moment.

  “You grew up.” I smiled as I ran my hand through his hair lovingly.

  “My dick got bigger too.” He grinned.

  I punched his arm. “Put me down, asshole!”

  He did as I asked, keeping an arm around my shoulders. He led us down the stairs. It was always easy with Duncan. I wish it could be that easy with everybody else.

  “Why are you really back, Finnie?” he asked as we entered the kitchen.

  I looked up at him. His embrace was warm, but his eyes told a different story. He was guarded, and dare I say, distrustful.

  Why was I back? Sure, I was summoned. But that’s not the real reason I came home. I had a plan, and I was grown enough to go through with it.

  “Because Ax said that if I didn’t show, he would send Nate and Andre after me,” I lied.

  Duncan chuckled.

  “They missed you too, Finnie. The whole club did.”

  I rolled my eyes as I opened the fridge.

  “How’s DD Enterprises?” I asked about the company that Axton and my father ran.

  “Boring as fuck,” he replied as I pulled out a premade meal. The house chef always had all kinds of meals ready.

  No one ever bothered to question what DD stood for. I didn’t even know what they told the media about what the double D’s meant. What I did know was the real meaning of it.

  Death Disciples.

  “Did the clubhouse get finished?”

  Duncan grinned.

  “A year after you left. Want to go check it out? I’m sure everyone will be glad to see you again.”

  When he said this, his eyes raked over my body.

  “Duncan,” I said in a sweet voice.

  “Yeah?” He raised a brow at me.

  “I helped you wash your undies so Eleanor wouldn’t know you peed the bed, so for the love of God, stop imagining me naked.”

  He threw his head back and laughed. He then wrapped me in his arms, his body still shaking with laughter until his choked laughter turned into choked sobs. His arms became suffocatingly tight, and I wrapped my hand around him with the other going to his head.

  Duncan and I were the younger ones, but he was the baby of the family. While I’d lost my parents a long time ago and a maternal figure; Duncan, Huxley, and Nash had lost their mother.

  “I’m sorry,” I whispered.

  His arms wrapped tighter against me. “Why didn’t you come?”

  I sucked in a breath at his tortured question.

  I knew Eleanor had passed away in a car accident. Still, the moment I got the text from Leon, Axton’s right-hand man, I knew it was either a tragic accident or the beginning of a war. Now I knew it was the latter. Coming back home at that time would have been too emotional. It would make the pain unbearable and real. Guess I didn’t want to make rash decisions while I was highly emotional.

  Nothing made you make stupid decisions like grief, sorrow—and alcohol.

  “I’m sorry,” I whispered once more as I kissed his sharp cheek.

  A dark chuckle had us pulling apart.

  “Guess you don’t have a problem with affection.” The words were spat a
t me. I turned to look at Huxley, and he was glaring at us. “You just have a problem when it’s toward me, my darling fiancée.”

  My eyes traveled to his face and then down his body, and a part of me did wish I could feel something for him—anything. A spark of desire was all I asked for because Huxley wasn’t ugly. Hell, he could be a model for IGM if we weren’t forced to lie low. He just wasn’t the guy for me.

  Duncan let go of me, and I took a step back. Huxley walked toward us, stopping right in front of me. I raised my brow at him. I wasn’t seventeen anymore, and I wasn’t going to marry someone I didn’t love nor want just for the sake of the company. I wasn’t going to put Hux’s feelings above my own.

  “What?” He looked down at me through half-mast eyes. “I don’t get some comfort?” He brought his hand out, and I forced myself not to flinch at his touch. “We could be so good together, Finley.”

  With his thumb, he caressed my cheek.

  Before I could reply and possibly break his heart, someone kicked the door.

  “Let’s go. We have a drop to make.”

  Nash didn’t even look at me as he spoke. He turned around and left.

  Huxley let go of me and followed after him.

  So many things were clicking into place. Nash, that son of a bitch. He hadn’t uttered a word to anyone about that night. My blood boiled, and my hate for him ran a little deeper.

  “I’m coming with you,” I told Duncan.

  Duncan smiled at me because he knew neither Nash nor Huxley would like the idea of me tagging along.

  “Where’s my bike?” I asked.

  “At the club.”

  “Guess I’m riding bitch.” I patted his back. Duncan threw an arm around me, and we walked to the garage where Nash and Huxley were already gearing up.

  Nash was already straddling his Harley when he saw Duncan and me come in. Huxley was about to get on his when his jaw went hard.

  “You’re not coming,” Huxley ground out.

  I ignored him as I made my way to Duncan’s Ducati.

  The club rode Harleys, as did Nash. We weren’t required to do the same, so we alternated on what was asked of the job.

  Duncan got on his matte-red bike, and handed me a matching helmet. Before putting it on, I faced Nash.

  “Don’t you think the princess should see how her cash is being made?” I asked, and watched in fascination as he almost looked angry from the way he held on to the handle bars just at the idea that I would get on the back of Duncan’s bike.

  I didn’t wait for a reply, nor did I have it in me to care. I put my helmet on and climbed on the bike. Heels, boots, bare feet—I could get on a bike in my sleep.

  “At least fucking change,” Huxley ground out.

  I lifted my helmet so he could hear what I said.

  “I’m not dressed any different than a club whore, and we all know you love those.”

  Duncan snorted.

  Yeah, my darling fiancé didn’t want me to know he was fucking girls left and right, but I’d always known and honestly never cared.

  My arms wrapped around Duncan as he started the engine. When he took off for the first time since leaving home, I felt at peace. My head rested on his back, and a smile spread across my face.

  The drive from the manor to the compound took about twenty minutes. The manor was on top of the hills, away from civilization and prying eyes. Meanwhile, the compound was on the outskirts of town. It was an old military building surrounded by a colossal fence around it.

  We arrived in formation with Nash going in first, followed by Huxley and Duncan and me last.

  Right away, I recognized most of the guys.

  I jumped off Duncan’s bike and handed him the helmet as I made my way to two of my favorite guys.

  “Aww, are you guys still in a secret relationship,” I said to Andre, one of the men Uncle Axton had threatened to send after me if I didn’t come home. His name wasn’t Andre—it was his nickname.

  “Holy shit, the princess is back.” Andre grinned at me. He was tall, pale, and blond; he had the whole Viking thing going on for him. Then I turned to the man who I thought was Nate, his best friend.

  “You’re not Nate,” I said even though I could see the similarities. From what I knew, Nate was an only child. He was just as tall and tan with a similar build, but where Nate had hazel eyes, his were jade.

  “You were missed, princess,” Andre said as he took a step toward me, but a voice halted him.

  “Finley is off-limits.” Nashton’s voice held a lethal edge—everyone who was outside heard him.

  “She yours?” the guy who wasn’t Nate, said. When you made someone off-limits around here, it was because you were ready to claim them as yours till death. Obviously not the case for me.

  My head turned toward Nashton. He was still on his bike, his leg spread, and he leaned into the handlebars.

  “She’s a Primrose.”

  Meaning that I, in fact, was a princess, and he was inferior to me, and no one in this compound other than a motherfucking Crull was good enough for me.

  “I was saying hi, not jumping on his dick.” I flipped my hair, dismissing what he said. His eyes narrowed and his nose flared. Yeah, I wasn’t the same girl he once knew.

  Aware that both Crull brothers were glaring at me, I opened my arms so I could hug Andre.

  “I love you, Finnie, but I ain’t trying to die,” he smirked at me.

  Before I could call him a pussy, Nate came out, putting on his leather vest.

  Death Disciples, MC.

  His patch said Vice President, and I was so proud of him.

  Nate had just lit his cigarette when he saw me. His face broadened, and he smiled at me. Since he was inside, he didn’t hear Nash’s warning. He had no idea I was untouchable. He looked so different since the last time I had seen him. That damn night haunted me always.

  “Fuck yeah, Finnie is back,” he howled.

  Since I was in the mood to piss off some people, I ran and threw myself at him.

  Nate was ready for me; his arms wrapped around my waist, and he twirled me.

  “Your tits got bigger.” The fucker grinned at me as he pressed me closer to him.

  “You have a brother,” I replied.

  “You’re fucking dead.” Andre came to pat Nate’s shoulder before he could answer.

  “What’d I do?” he asked while still holding me close.

  I grinned up at him.

  “Nash made me untouchable.”

  “You’re still trying to kill me,” he groaned as he slid me off his body, then made his way to Nash and shook his hand.

  Chapter Three

  There had never been a time since I could remember that Finley Primrose hadn’t been a part of my life.

  She was the daughter of my dad’s business partner, so we were always around each other. Then around three, she and Huxley became best friends and used to team up to torment me.

  They did everything together, from taking naps, bathing, joining Little League, leaving Little League, baking cookies, making a mess, and getting in trouble. They were inseparable.

  Then at thirteen, Finley was an orphan, and the girl who was always around was now under our care. She was like a sister to me. She was always sad but hid it well. Something my brother seemed to forget a lot. She was a great addition to our family. The daughter my mom never had.

  Then she turned fifteen the summer I had turned eighteen, and everything changed.

  My brother started to develop feelings for her, and I saw the way she began to look at me.

  She was a kid, and I was the prince of an empire. Everything I wanted, I had at the snap of my fingers—all types of girls, different shapes and flavors. Besides, she was promised to my brother. An arranged marriage her father and my father had wagered a long time ago.

  We all had our jobs for the family, and mine was to protect them.

  Then Finley turned seventeen, and that was the catalyst for the mess we were now in. I ha
d gone away for almost two months on a job, and when I came back, the girl that came running toward me wasn’t the same one I had left behind.

  All the things that made Finley look like a child had disappeared. Her freckles were now covered by light makeup. Her features no longer held that childish charm but were replaced with mischief, and then there was her body.

  I felt like a dick by how I held her closer to me, knowing she was what my brother wanted the most.

  “She’s like a sister to me, bro,” Nate said as he shook my hand.

  “Tell that to Huxley and not to me.”

  Nate gave me a knowing look but didn’t say more. He was going to let me play the pretend game, and I fucking needed that.

  “Have you talked to her about that night, about why she had to leave?”

  My only answer was to grind my jaw and keep quiet.

  “Finley is joining us,” I said as I got off my bike.

  “Cool.” Nate shrugged as he took a drag of his cigarette. My father, Finley’s dad, and Gunner started something a long time ago. We were Death Disciples, but we weren’t. The three of us were the face the world saw, but the club governed themselves. Gunner was the president and Nate their VP. Gunner and Nate got a vote at board meetings. They represented the club’s best interest, and Axton and I got a vote at the table.

  This was the main chapter; all the other chapters had no idea what really went down at the top. It was best if it wasn’t known who really called all the shots.

  In the club, women had no voice. They did what their men wanted and trusted that they would do right by them. Finley was another story. She was a Primrose, a founding member, so she got a seat at both tables by default. We made our clean cash with the company, but our real money came with the club.

  We walked into the chapel to decide how we were going to do the pickup and the drop. Huxley was pissed off, but then again, my little brother had always had a war inside his head. I loved him, but he needed to let go of the idea that we needed changing because the truth was the life we were in, there was no getting out of it.

  Finley was talking animatedly with Andre. The smile on her face was genuine, kind of like the one she gave my baby brother. The one she used to give to me.